Confused: I've been going back and forth with this guy for about a year now. Now, we've never really been offical, and despite some kissing and what not, nothing has happened between us, but, there has been heavy tension. Sexual tension. I like him lots as a person. However, for some reason I just don't really feel like having a relationship with him, and I also don't want to make things more complicated for us. What do I do? From Canada and the United States, I need advice.
Thanks, Confused

Dear Confused, This is a difficult question to answer because I don't know what you're perspective on things are, and your past experiences. The most logical response to this question is, if you're not interested in having a relationship with him then you shouldn't lead him on, just cut all relationship ties with him. And about the tension, if you're not confronted by it, then you won't think about it, so just ignore it. But if you feel as though you could have a serious relationship with him, you should wait until you fully trust this guy to do anything serious with him, or wait until you know that you're ready. You seem to like this guy, but maybe he's better qualified as a good friend rather then a boyfriend? I hope that I've managed to help you out, but this question was harder for me, the goddess of dating, then I expected. I tried my best. If you have anymore questions, don't hesitate.
Natasha

Relayed to Confused

What you have done here is something I like to call digging yourself into a hole, you have made it seem like what you want is a relationship. Besides the fact that if you have been "seeing each other" (as I'm lead to assume you have been) then maybe you don't want a realtionship now, but someone once told me " a realtionship is not about how much you start off with, its about how much you end with". If you two have been going on and off for a year or so, he at least deserves a chance. But thats not saying that you should'nt let him understand situation. Sit down with him and tell him how you feel, if you are willing to try out a relationship tell him that. Sexual tension comes and goes like clockwork. Don't let it come between you two. I, despite what Natasha may think, believe that trust has nothing to do with sexual relations. There is nothing wrong with having your occassional one night stand, hell even if you just want to be friends who have sex. The only thing I'm going to strongly recommend is that you don't cut off all realtionship ties, because first of all your going to hurt him, talk it out with him andif you decide to do it suddenly it will hurt him, it will make him loose trust in you, which will lead to complications in your friendship.
Mr.G